5 min read

Raniera: Mindfulness & Masculinity

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Raniera Rewiri was born and bred in Whakatāne. While he does wear many hats, it is his role as a pāpā and husband that he is most proud of. Raniera is a content creator who is passionate about offering value to others in the space of growth, personal development, health and relationships. He has his own online course, Te Arahou, which he describes as a container for others that are wanting to better themselves. He is also host to the popular Planting Seeds Podcast.

We met with Raniera to explore his journey of healing, change and the ways in which mindfulness has supported his growth.  

Raniera describes mindfulness as the expansion of awareness – being aware of the thoughts you’re thinking, the way you process them and why that might be. The more you practice mindfulness, the greater capacity you have to challenge yourself and make positive life changes.

Raniera is no stranger to healing and change. He recalls a breakup in his younger years that was particularly challenging. At that time, he didn’t have the tools to deal with his emotions and found himself drinking and using drugs as an escape. He was in and out of jobs, not being smart with money, and falling into other relationships. One day he decided he’d had enough and started to question why he was making these choices.

I realised that I was looking to my relationships to make me happy. I gave a lot to the relationship, but when it didn’t come back to me, I’d feel those feelings of abandonment and being unloved.

When I identified that, I thought, what would it look like if I started to fill my own cup? And that’s when I started to get into personal development and meditation.

Mindfulness enabled Raniera to identify the ways he had contributed to his relationship breakdowns. When he took the time to understand where he went wrong, he found areas in his life that needed healing. Raniera says that we must allow ourselves to feel all the emotions of a situation in order to heal from it.

I won’t sugar coat it – it’s been hard to go through so much healing. Taking responsibility for your actions and being honest with yourself is hard. But essentially, this is what has given me the most breakthroughs in life and allowed me to be more courageous and joyful. It’s been a beautiful journey the last six years for me.

Raniera practices mindfulness through a range of activities from Brazilian Jiu Jitsu to walking in the ngahere and cold-water immersion. He says, that when we’re in nature, we can be more present and detach from any worries or concerns. There is space to breathe, to think and look at situations from a fresh perspective.

There are many ways to practice mindfulness beyond physical movement. Alternative ways could be listening to a guided meditation, journaling, being still or simply focusing on breathing. Taking time to be present in a moment can make a huge difference to the way we show up to the day.

Life gets challenging at times, when we think about all the responsibilities, and hats we wear as men. For me, trying to be a provider, creator, run a business and sustain a family – there’s ups and downs. Sometimes there’s a lot of money and times there isn’t money. As men, we can put so much pressure on ourselves that we end up falling short. In times like this, I enter into the ocean to shake those feelings off and pass it on to Tangaroa Hine Moana.

Being surrounded by supportive people is one of the ways Raniera sustains his journey of change. He leans on podcasts, motivational YouTube videos, his wife, whānau, friends and mentors to help him. Each person or tool offers a different perspective or type of support. Some can go deep in conversation and others might just help shift the energy through humour or a new idea. The more self-aware you become, the more you can recognise what type of support you need in any given moment.

Raniera says to surround yourself by people who are smarter than you, even if that’s through a podcast – you will eventually notice that the way you think, speak and carry yourself changes.

If you can listen to a podcast or be in different environments where you can observe behaviour and language  you will grow. Your vocabulary and emotional literacy will expand. You’ll find it easier to articulate yourself when working through challenges.

Mindfulness plays a significant role in helping us to become more self-aware. The better we know ourselves – the good, bad and the ugly – the better we can take care of ourselves and those around us.

Healing and change is possible for anyone. It starts with small steps which grow into greater shifts. When Raniera first started his journey, he struggled to hold and articulate his emotions. Fast-forward six years, and his online course Te Arahou holds space to teach others how to become more mindful, self-aware and heal.

I love the life that I’ve created for myself and it has come through making a series of decisions and reflections. When you sit with a feeling long enough, you start to really consider, well, how could my life change. All it takes to get started is one small window of courage.

If you’d like to learn other practical ways to be more mindful, connect with Raniera via Instagram, The Planting Seeds Podcast or his online course Te Arahou.

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